Lately I wish I had my own little crystal ball that will give me a glimpse of the future. Just to see if everything will be alright so that I can stop worrying so much. When I was little I always knew what I wanted to do and knew how to achieve it, but now it isn’t that clear anymore. Being at the final stages of my Bachelor’s degree scares me, the fact that easy student life will be over in one year or two after I get my Master’s degree makes me wonder if I am even ready for the ”real” world? I’m a very strong lady, I have an opinion on everything and I’m not afraid to voice that opinion and debate, also not afraid of admitting when I’m wrong which helps me grow. But what if I’m only strong now and not when it’s time to find a job? Can I handle the competition from all over the world since I want to work in the field of international law… which is filled with so many talented people? What if I don’t have the capacity to change the world as I thought I had when I was little? These questions and many more worry me, I keep calling into the future but nobody is picking up the phone. Worrying wont get me far, and it def’ wont get me where I want to be. To have a vision for myself was the first step, now bringing that vision to reality is the second step. Fear and worry are part of the game, just to see if you can overcome those two and continue the path you’ve chosen for yourself. I’m determined to make the dreams I had as a little girl come true, I owe her that. The fact is that nothing comes easy, everybody needs to work hard to get what they want, being scared of the world wont help me even a bit. I just need to stay focussed on my goals and follow the path without dwelling on my insecurities and worries. I guess it’s time to enjoy the present before it passes.
So okay Future, don’t pick up the phone … I’ll get there.